Resilient since day one: Part 1

  • Published
  • By Patrick Corbeil
  • 31st Fighter Wing Equal Opportunity
AVIANO AIR BASE, Italy --  In September, 1985, I graced this world with my presence.

Unlike most newborns that have a nursery, my parents were living in a tent in a friend's back yard due to their unforeseen circumstances. For five years we lived in numerous backyards, spare bedrooms and hotel rooms.

In 1990, my father got a job and was able to rent a small house for us. While he was at work, my mother was often out doing "mother things" or so she told me. So I was left on my own to do pretty much whatever I wanted. We lived in Mago Point a suburb of Waterford, Connecticut. Most of my days were spent combing the beaches for "treasure" or building sand forts to protect me from pirates.

Mago Point is a fishing community, with fishing boats coming in and out like clockwork.  I can recall one summer morning when I was at the docks pretty early. I was messing with the crabs and an older fisherman came up and made a bet with me. He bet me I couldn't catch 10 crabs by the time his boat returned, but if I did he would buy me lunch. If I didn't, I would have to eat a crab. Unknown to me at the time, the fisherman knew who I was and knew I could catch all 10.  He just wanted to buy me lunch.

Everyone in the community knew my family and that I was left alone during the day. The local diner gave me food regularly when I would come in. I just thought everyone went there to get free food. It wasn't until I was much older that I realized they all took me under their wing and cared for me.

At first, school seemed normal until after the first month kids starting taunting me. Since my family didn't have much money, I would wear the same clothes, sometimes three days in a row.

In 1992 I went to a friend's birthday party where we watched the movie "Hook."  Before then, never had I seen a movie that I related too. It featured a group of children living on their own and thriving. I had a parent who worked all the time and a mother who was never around. I was a lost boy, and Mago Point was my Neverland.

When my father was laid off it was back on the streets for us. We spent nights in park gazeebos, homeless shelters and even public restrooms. September, 1993, a few days after my birthday, I was wandering the streets of my new Neverland, New London, CT, when two police officers approached me. They questioned me about why I wasn't in school. As any scared 8 year old would do, I ran. When they finally caught me and brought me to the police station, they had a line of questions about where my parents were and why I wasn't in school. Eventually, I led them to the abandoned building where we were living. They brought my mother in for questioning. After what seemed like an eternity, I was turned over to the Department of Children and Families and placed into a foster home.

Not sure if it was fate or just the way the system works, but the foster home I was placed in, was my biological mother's cousin .When I showed up at her doorstep, she immediately recognized me. From that moment, I knew my life would be completely different.

My new family provided a roof over my head, at least three meals a day and a sense of family that I never felt before. Everything looked up for me until the summer of 1994, during a visitation with my biological mother. Instead of heading to the mall, my biological mother brought me to the train station and purchased two one-way tickets to Tampa, FL. I was being kidnapped and had no idea. We stayed under the radar for about a month before the staff of the homeless shelter was contacted by the Connecticut Department of Children and Families. The very next day I was on my way back to the new family which started to feel like my real family.

My foster mom received full custody of me and adopted me in 1998. From then on I had a pretty typical life, until 2001 when my adopted mom was diagnosed with ovarian cancer. The one person, who I finally had a connection with, who showed me what it was like to have a family, was diagnosed with cancer. We made the best of her last 11 months, until she passed away on Oct. 11, 2002.

I was a senior in high school and felt like I was on my own again. I had the support of my new, adopted, extended family, including aunts, uncles and cousins, but felt alone.

After high school, I was offered a full scholarship to the local community college because I was a child of the state. Since I was on my own, I had to provide for myself in addition to being a full-time student. At one of my two jobs, the employer had just hired someone who had separated from the Navy. I explained to my new coworker how I was dealing with school and work just to make ends meet. He explained how the military could pay me and also give me a place to live, provide me food, and pay for my college. I was captivated!

The next day I visited the Air Force recruiter's office and made the greatest decision of my life.

I began my journey in the United States Air Force on June 21, 2005.

You never know the story of the Airman next to you. Before you jump to conclusions know that we're all Airmen. We all have stories that make us unique, and that diversity is a source of strength not weakness.